Sunday, February 5, 2012

Since you dont read this


I miss you pretty much constantly.. but I know you don’t miss me at all, because you are so busy with work and stressed out and have too much going on to even think about me. and it shows in your actions and it hurts so much, but I would never tell you that because I am understandable. And when I try to tell you how I feel you get mad.

So I keep it in. and cry more than you would like to know. but its sort of like you don’t care.

And  it hurts so bad. but I love you so much. So I just deal with it and continue to be understanding. And not ask for much, or anything.  Because when you do care and when you do have time you are so perfect.

But then you do things, well actually it’s the fact that you don’t do things. Its important for you to have pictures up from when you went hunting, but you don’t even tell anyone in your family the color of my hair.

Its that you are too busy to make reservations for new years so I pretend like its okay and say we can just go to your favorite restaurant.  Because being in your city wasn’t enough, you also had to have that.

And its that you can run to the store to get wine on the way home from work, but you don’t think to pick up flowers. Because I risked a lot to be with you for five weeks,  but you had too much on your mind and didn’t think to do that.
It’s that I love you. and want to be loved in return.

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